It’s Boxing Day around these parts and that means one thing - SALES!

I had big plans to be out the door by 7 a.m. this morning in search of the deals of the century. But, a perogi hangover (those things are brutal in the food coma department) left me less than energetic and I am officially in slug mode today.

But, before consuming more potato-packed goodness than is good for anybody, the CVK crew did come up with our Top 10 Tips for Scoring the Bargains as a Family on Boxing Day. Boxing Day sales sometimes bring out the worst in people. In the spirit of holiday cheer, here are some light-hearted tips for surviving a big-box-store Boxing Day experience.

They could actually be quite useful:).

We’re going to test-drive our theory as soon as the bread comes out of our new bread maker…OK, we’re just going to lay around in our pajamas and sleep off the perogis.

1. Gather the family and set up a plan of action. Having a clear plan is critical in order to ensure that you score the 75%-off wrapping paper and 4-for-1 Christmas tree decorations. We are particularly concerned with scoring the 60%-off lawn ornaments as Grandma has now sworn that our house will be the Courtenay Christmas Castle next year. This plan should include a clear layout knowledge of the stores you intend to hit as well as the duties of each family member (score finder, cart pusher, candy eater).

2. Procure some whistles and develop a code for alerting other family members when you find a major score. Screaming in the store only draws attention. Whistles are annoying, which means people will turn and go a different direction when they hear a blast instead of run to see what you’ve got there. We’re going with the three-blast alert. So, if you’re headed to Canadian Tire or Superstore, come up with another signal or we’ll be honing in on YOUR scores. Other tips for distraction of would-be competitors include: Strategic placement of screaming toddler is always effective for clearing an aisle for 10 minutes or so. Failing that, a well-faked hacking cough, rubbing eyes and sniffling constantly is golden. If all else fails, yell “Oh, honey, did you poop?” and then mention that you’ll need to change your tiny person right there in the aisle.

3. Know what you’re looking for. You can blame only yourself for not knowing what is on sale. The Echo and The Record have done a fine job of stuffing out mailboxes to the gills with sale ads.:) Going in with a clear plan means you can hit the door of the store running, saving valuable browsing time better left for those days when you’ve left the kiddos at Grandmas and are squeezing every last moment of alone time in.

4. Whip out the hockey and basketball highlight videos before hitting the stores. This critical piece of the equation gives you the basic knowledge of blocking out opponents that is crucial to scoring that last $49.99 DVD player.

5. Fending off cart surfers is another clear reason to studying up with those highlight videos. But, be careful to watch the aggression level lest you land the whole family in a back room with RCMP on the way. My recommendation here is to have a few basic household items on your list as well. Strategic placement of bleach and dog food are excellent ways to keep those criminals away from the 24 boxes of $2.99 ornaments beneath.

6. Line ups at the till are a guaranteed nightmare. Strategic placement of a family member in line is crucial. If they get to the till before you have the gear to them, here are some excellent delay tactics:

7. Strategic usage of the “return” technique. Once you are ready to check out, a loud bark of “I hope they’ll take returns in this line,” is sure to clear the area in a flash. The mere thought of being near a person who will take triple the time in line as any normal human is like magic in the disappearing line department. A screaming child is extremely effective in this department as well.

8. I also highly recommend dividing the purchases up and sending family members off in multiple lines. Even if you have to run through and swipe the debit card in three different places, the time saving is rather stunning. Purchasing while procuring, by having a runner that speeds things to family members who are in line, is handy.

9. Employing purchasing techniques. This is where all of those out-of-town visitors come in handy. If a family member is still without gear at the front of the line, have them begin talking about needing to pay in foreign currency. Everyone behind them will rapidly be looking for another check out.

10. The mother of all delay tactics, the penny technique. Placing mother and child in the line while other family members are rounding up gear is a good strategic bet as, when things get rough, mom can always quip “Yes honey, you can pay in pennies.” Everyone in the store might leave with that one in place.

:):):)

Happy Boxing Day!